Relationship Reminders

1. Do not expect anything in particular to happen.

2. Do not declare victory.

3. You have not overpowered anything, passed any test, or proven yourself in any way, nor should you want to.

4. Nothing that can happen can raise the quality of your life. That is determined only by your consciousness.

5. Do not succumb to famine-thinking—especially in the moment of conversation. Do not be opportunistic.

That being said, remember that if you want to make conversation with someone, the best time to do it is while they are already in your physical presence. This is much easier and more considerate than chasing.

6. Do not imagine that anything is expected or desired of you-- or even thought, for that matter.

It wouldn’t matter even if it was.

7. Resist the urge to fill the air with sounds.

8. Actively resist groupthink.

9. Remain integrous, proactive, impeccable, and conscious.

10. You need nothing.

11. Be considerate—polite, civil, gentle, and allowing.

12. No one is special (except everyone).

13. People are afraid of you only if you give them a reason to be.

14. When you communicate, do so openly, honestly, and directly. State your intentions and use your words.

15. Do not look away. Do not run from discomfort.

16. Have no agenda.

17. Whatever you do, whatever happens, you can be happy. Your happiness lies in your hands, and nowhere else. Do not let the unhappiness of others become your own.

18. Enjoy the heck out of yourself.

19. No clawing, clinging, or chasing. No forcing. No convincing. No persuading. No feigning. No trying. No begging. No whining. No praying for forgiveness. No race to the bottom. No longing for attention. No drama-creation for the sake of sympathy. No mono-drama.

20. No stories, no analyzing.

21. Care, but don’t push it.

22. Move from head to heart, but don’t fake it.


24. Whatever you do, go for it. When in doubt, fly high.

25. It’s OK to be happy about this.


27. OK, chill out now.

28. Just be yourself. Be the person you are when alone—wherever you go.

29. No one cares. Unless they do.

30. Everyone has an ego.

31. Everyone tells and believes in stories.

32. Trust first, and trust unconditionally.


Got it all? I know there are a lot of pieces. But you’ve done them all before, and you can keep doing them. Do it up.